There is one thing that I’ve often thought was sadder than a funeral itself. It is the way that everyone stands around saying what they liked about the deceased when they are no longer around to hear it. Sometimes it is even sadder to hear that they never told the person in question.

Why is it so hard for us to say positive things to each other?

It certainly seems easier to be critical and to say negative things. And when you think about this it does start to make sense.

Saying positive things opens us up and makes us vulnerable to the other person and to rejection. While saying negative things closes things down and seems to keep us safer and more distant from the other person.

One change I can make this year is to say positive things to people when I get the chance. Not suggesting to make stuff up, just to speak truth. I’m not waiting for another funeral to say a positive thing about someone. And if that opens me up to rejection then c’est la vie!

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